You may be thinking that by having gay friends, you must be entirely accepting - perhaps even an avid supporter - of the LGBTQ+ community. Now, that might just be the case, but there are so many ways to support the community that will really make a difference to the way you perceive them and, therefore, to the way they feel they are perceived. So, to help you out a little, I'm going to give you a little list of things you can try, as a way to open your mind to ultimately allow you to understand and support members of the LGBTQ+ community.
Why not try:
- Being open minded
- So many people have engrained prejudices that they're not even aware of. The amount of times my relatives have come out with: "Well, I don't mind if people are gay but bisexual? That's just strange. How can you like both genders? Which gender will be just your friends? How will you have a relationship because then you have to choose?" Let me just clarify that these were not actual questions (which I could have easily answered), they were rhetorical questions. This is obviously an issue; being closed minded completely prevents you from becoming educated, realising new truths. So, try being open to new realities. This is the first step to understanding LGBTQ+ definitions - what they mean and how they manifest. Once you've understood the definitions, then you'll come across as understanding rather than ignorant, which will minimise your risk of being (even if unintentionally) offensive.
- Addressing your own prejudices
- This is similar to the previous point, but being self-aware is key. Once you know what confuses/bothers you, you can then educate yourself to become more accepting.
- Asking these gay friends of yours to fill in the blanks
- Despite so many people claiming that "you can't say anything anymore without causing offence", all you need to do is ask. Let's say you don't understand how a bi person can fancy both genders, if you just ask them in a sensitive manner "wait so how can you fancy both genders?", I can't imagine they would get offended. The problem is when people assume things about certain sexualities and then have an issue with them, based on prejudice not reality.
- Understanding that everyone is different
- Remember that sexuality is a spectrum, so even if you identify as say 'bisexual', other bi people may not have the same feelings or experiences as you. Some may feel 50, 50 - they like girls and guys equally - whilst others may feel more strongly towards lets say girls. So basically, don't assume, and again, be open minded.
- Standing up to homophobic people
- If you hear people saying things that are clearly offensive to non-straight people, why not try standing up to them. That said, remember that sometimes people are just joking and if you over-defend it can reinforce the "overly sensitive" stereotype. So try to differentiate between what's serious - and therefore offensive - and what's just a joke.
Basically, the key is to be open minded and understanding. It's pretty hard to harm anyone with that mindset.